By Jordyn Glaser
“The Life Letters” is an ongoing pro-life series designed to encourage foster and adoptive parents and provide inspiration and insight to all pro-life readers.
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In Over Our Heads
In the summer of 2020, we received a call from a close friend who wanted to discuss a difficult case involving children currently under the care of the Department of Human Services. Two-year-old twin boys had recently been removed from horrific conditions. Both had high trauma, and one twin had nonverbal autism. Since it was 2020, the world was coping with its own bizarre struggle, and therefore available homes for placements were few and far between. DHS was hoping to connect the boys with a mixed-race family who also knew the ins and outs of establishing much-needed special-needs services. We were not currently in the foster care game, but after that phone call, we got pulled from the sideline almost immediately.
Brian and I completed the emergency certification with the understanding that we would be a temporary placement to ensure the boys stayed together. We now had six children under the age of 10 and three with intense special needs. My old SUV contained four carseats, and I walked around town with a double stroller with an attachable hover board for a third rider.
Although our family met certain markers that DHS believed would be beneficial for the twins, we were also wildly in over our heads.
Wildly.
Most people questioned our sanity… or worse, gave us credit for being amazing, which, as foster and adoptive parents, we know is not the case. We found ourselves in a season when we didn’t get invited to a lot of things, and we definitely did not go on any family vacations during the time the twins were in our home. There were moments I questioned why God had placed the boys in our care and many nights when I lay in bed worrying that we would never be able to make a difference in their case. But through it all, I knew in my heart that our family had been given the opportunity to be a part of something God was doing. I just didn’t quite understand it yet.
Fish and Loaves
The only miracle featured in all four gospels, with the exclusion of the Resurrection, is the story of Jesus feeding the five thousand. We can look even further into this story and see a small detail that is only noted in the Gospel of John. There is one line that briefly mentions that it is a boy who comes forward and provides the five barley loaves and two fish. It’s important to recognize that this detail is in no way the main point of the message. This miracle is about the person and work of Christ. But there is also a lesson we can take away from this boy in the story.
He knew what he had to offer was basically an inconsequential contribution in comparison to the need at hand. But we can assume from this account that this boy believed Christ could take what he was offering and use it – which ultimately mattered more than the actual offering itself.
He came forward and handed over everything he had, and then watched Christ work.
Handing Over Everything
After five months of being in our care, the twins were moved into the home of what would soon become their permanent adoptive family. Over the next few years, we watched from a distance as they thrived. Once I found myself removed from the center of the situation, I could finally see that our family was always meant to be a stepping stone in the process. Our “yes” allowed them to stay together, feel safe and loved, receive special needs services, and then ultimately connect with their forever home. Our short time in their lives was a small and maybe even inconsequential part, but our piece of the story gave us the gift of being part of what God was doing.
It was never really about what we could offer. I have no doubt that God could have used anyone. It was all about what God could do.
As foster and adoptive parents, sometimes our contribution can feel small or even pointless.
We question if we are even making a difference. But the truth is that every “yes” we give is a version of walking forward and handing over what we have, and then having faith enough to know that God will use it for His glory.
It’s not about what we bring to the table. It’s about what God can do with it. So go ahead and give him what you have.
It’s always worth it.
